The Vampire, The Cat, And The Frog That Hated Them
by AnalGorilla
Summary: The tale of how Dio the Vampire met Dexstar The Red Lantern, and how a cowboy known as Kermit The Frog tried to kill them. A tale of two unlikely heroes and the escalating situation that surrounds them.
1. Chapter 1

Dio Brando: A young boy who was adopted by the Joestar family after his father died. Upon growing up, grew to hate the Joestar son nicknamed Jojo and became a vampire in an attempt to kill him. Super strong with other powers, Dio is number one.

Dex-starr: A blue cat. After his owner died, some kids tried to kill him. With great rage in his heart, he was inducted into the Red Lanterns. Can make constructs with his ring, also vomits napalm blood. And napalm hairballs.

Cowboy Kermit The Frog: He's… Cowboy Kermit The Frog. I mean, come on, what else do you need to know?

This story takes place around 1890. Picks up after Dio tried to kill Jojo and failed, resulting in the Joestar mansion burning down and Dio being considerably messed up.

Chapter 1

What once was the majestic mansion of the Joestar family lies in smoldering ruins. It's been almost a week since the battle that was waged here. Small fires continue to burn, devouring the last of the wood from the structure. Shattered glass, crushed stone, and various furniture litter the land. There is no one left here after the battle that had taken place the previous night. But there is something else that witnessed that night...

Outside of the mansion grounds, just in the surrounding woods, a small marker stands. Its construction is simple, merely two planks nailed together in the shape of a cross. The silent witness to the whole event a week ago. The roaring flames, the blood-curdling screams, the lives lost, it bore witness to it all. But it paid it no mind. Its occupant rests peacefully in eternal slumber, the matters of this world no longer its concern.

Dark clouds roll in. The pitter-patter of rain starts slowly, but picks up. It hammers the ground of the grave. But something larger than a rain drops hits the mound of dirt, and slips its way through. Something dark. Something evil. Something black.

"Danny The Dog of Earth, you who loved your master more than anything on this world, how did no wrong, killed out of jealously by a creature that still walks this Earth."

"Danny The Dog of Earth."

"RISE."

"How I have lowered myself…" Dio says, wiping the blood from his mouth. The falling rain hits his scarred body, still weak and broken from his fight with Jojo. The gaping wound in his chest has closed, but not the hole in his pride. He is still but an infant's strength to what he was at the mansion, but his hate of Jojo still burns greatly.

Around him lies the pale and empty bodies of a small caravan that was passing through the woods. Gypsies. Peasants. Peons. Hardly worthy meals for the great Dio, he thinks to himself, but he needs their blood if he is to survive.

"Lord Dio," says Wang Chung, Dio's recently converted servant. He holds a crudely drawn pamphlet in his hands. "It seems these people were heading to a town called Windknights. It's on the coast, very out of the way, perfect for you to start your recovery and amassing an undead army."

"Hmph. That's not for you to decide," Dio says, snatching the paper from his servant's hands. It features a picture of the town, with a large castle along the coast. "With its occupants, I can start my own army and crush all within Dio's way. Just watch me, Jojo! From this Windknights, Dio will spread over England and crush you under him!"

Dio throws the paper into the mud. Stepping over the bodies, he enters into one of the carriages of the caravan. Wang Chung hops into the driver's seat, and whips the horses, signaling them to go.

Inside, Dio thinks of his defeat at the mansion by Jojo. "A mere human, defeating the great Dio," he sneers, but he knows that Jojo is no mere human, but was at one time, almost Dio's equal. Next time, Jojo won't have luck on his side. Next time, Dio will show him he is superior. Dio looks outside to see they have not moved from their position. He opens the door.

"Wang Chung, why haven't we moved?!" He shouts, but he needs no answer. In front of the carriage, he sees that the horses have been decapitated, their necks still spraying a red crimson mist that mixes with the rain. He places his hand on his head, clearly annoyed. "I told you not to kill the horses, you incompetent!"

"Master Dio, it was not me! Something…" Wang Chung starts, but is cut off as a black shadow grabs him and drags him into the woods. Dio does even blink, just lets out a 'hmph.' He jumps on top of the carriage, looking into the woods. Wang's scream echoes through the trees, but suddenly comes to an abrupt stop. Dio stands tense on the carriage. He's not fully recovered, but he can still put up a fight. But for such a creature to be able to take out Wang Chung, who was a lowly servant vampire but a vampire nonetheless, may prove an inconvenience for him.

The carriage rocks as something large slams into the side. Dio jumps off just in time, as the carriage goes hurdling over the woods crashing loudly in the distance. He lands in the mud amongst his previous meal.

"Urrrrryyyyyyy…" he bellows, under his breath, annoyed. Such power, he thinks. Could there be others like him in the world? Impossible, he thinks, Dio stands above all. He stares into the woods from the direction the object came from, but sees nothing. He narrows his eyes as he spots a smaller object flying towards him, the size of a cannonball. Dio puts out his arm to catch it, but it's not rigid, and instead his arm goes through it. He looks down by his shoulder where the object stopped to see it's the head of Wang Chung.

Before he can remove it, he is tackled to the ground. He slides through the mud and through the trees, knocking them down and splintering them until he stops against a large stump. He looks up to see what has him pinned. It's the charred, burned corpse of a large dog, it's mouth dripping with blood and saliva. A collar hangs from it's neck with a tag: Danny. Next to the tag dangles a black ring.

"UUUUUUUURRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYYY!" Scream Dio, as the dog's powerful laws come down on his shoulder. It tears what remains of Wang's head and throws it aside, taking a large chunk of Dio's flesh with it. It turns back to Dio. The hollow caves where its eyes should be instead have a small piecing light shining through. It opens its jaws, wider and wider until they are straight up and down from each other, and then it slams down on Dio's chest. It begins piercing his skin. Dio lets out a laugh.

"Stupid beast. What makes you think you can take on Dio now?!" Dio shouts, shoving his hands under the beast's mouth and lifting it from his chest. He stands up holding the struggling dog. "Useless! YOU SHOULD HAVE STAYED IN YOUR GRAVE!"

He flings the dog deeper into the forest, its body rocketing through more trees, sending splinters and chunks of wood about, skidding to a stop in the mud. It struggles to its feet put is slammed back down as Dio's fist hammers in to its head.

"Weak. Weak. WEAK. WEAK! WEAK WEAK WEAK WEAKWEAKWEAKWEAKWEAKWEAKWEAK WEAK!" Dio scream, as his fists rain down on the dog like the galloping hooves of a horse. He finishes his assault with a powerful knee under the dogs mouth, sending it rocketing into the sky, disappearing into the horizon. He turns, placing his hands in his pocket and walking back to the road. "Useless."

Dio only manages to take a few steps before he is pushed back onto the ground. He turns his head to see the dog has him pinned, this time from the back, it's legs holding his appendages down. His assault had little effect, if any, on the beast. The dog wastes no time as its jaw opens wide and slams into Dio's back. It tears into him, slowly ripping through his thick vampire flesh. He feels its grip tightening around his heart. He struggles, but the beast is stronger now somehow, holding him tightly to the mud. He feels his heart bulging, pressed against the beast teeth. But the pain suddenly stops as the dog is flung forward by a red beam.

Dio slowly struggles to his feet, feeling the open wound on his back slowly healing. His vision blurry, he sees in front of him a small figure of red, black, and blue.

"Meow," the creature says.

Back at the remains of the Joestar mansion, a small horse comes to a stop. It's rider hops off, and pats the beast on its head. It walks over to the mansion ruins, stopping where the front door used to be. It reaches out with its small green hand for a small stone that contains only a J of what used to read JOESTAR.

"J," says the small green man, tilting his hat up. "The letter J."

TO BE CONTINUED


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

As his vision clears and his wounds heal, Dio can now be sure that what's in front of him is no illusion; that the creature that stands before Dio is indeed a blue cat. It wears a tight leotard to its body, colored red and black, with a strange symbol on its belly. A red aura surrounds the cat, emanating what can only be described as pure hate. Dio stares at it bemused, as he strikes a pose. Such bizarre things have been happening of late, he thinks to himself.

"Mrrrrrrrrow?" The cat says, turning to Dio. Its mouth is frothed red, as a torrent of steaming blood pours forth from it. The drops sizzle on the cold wet ground beneath it. Is this some sort of extraterrestrial, Dio wonders.

"MROW!" The creature shrieks, it's back hunching up.

"What are you…" Dio starts, before he is slammed to the ground by the undead dog.

"DISGUSTING MUTT!" Dio shouts, fighting with all his vampire strength to keep the dog's jaws from his chest. It wants his heart, and almost succeeded moments ago before this alien cat rescued him. But the creature has become stronger. Dio's arms bulge as he pushes with all his might, but its gaping maw inches closer and closer.

"MRRRRROW!" Screams the cat, as a red beam impacts into the side of the dog. It rocks slightly from the hit, but rights itself quickly, continuing its descent over Dio's chest. More beams rocket into the dog's side, as the alien cat hisses. Dio's eyes go wide as from the dog's throat, slimy, black tentacles burst forth, embedding themselves into his chest. He feels them slither around inside hi like snakes, wrapping tightly around his heart.

"DO YOU HAV ANY OTHER TRICKS, RUNT?!" Dio shouts, as the black tentacles tug at his heart. He feels his strength leaving him, his vision blurring. The dim light from the dog's empty eye cavities is all he can see as things being to blacken. But the pain quickly leaves him, as he feels the weight of the dog relieved.

The chest wounds slowly being to close as Dio crawls to his feet. He looks up to see something straight out of a fairy tale children would repeat to each other, but now is all too real. From the small alien cat, a giant, red glowing cat has emerged. Bigger than an elephant, bigger than even the largest creatures that walked the Earth millions of years ago.

It's giant paws slam down upon the undead dog, sending dirt and broken bits of trees flying. It picks up the dog in it's front paws, and holding it, begins kicking it with it's large, powerful back paws with scythe-sized claws. The dog is torn apart, blackened bits flung amongst the forest, including the undead beast's head which bounces against a tree stump. The giant glowing cat crouches down, shakes its back, and pounces upon the dog's head. It places it in its mouth, and chews it until there is nothing left.

The giant cat construct disappears. Dio turns his attention to the small blue cat. Such power, Dio thinks. To believe this universe has creatures that could almost rival him…

"MROW," the cat says, looking up at Dio. He merely sneers back at it, folding his arms across his chest and contorting his body into another pose.

"Do you expect thanks from Dio, runt? I'll do so by simply letting you live," Dio says, as he begins to walk away. But a loud hiss from the cat has him turn around again. The cat stands hunch backed, its blue tail puffed up. The ground in front of it has turned pitch black, as if the muted color had been sucked right from it, but glows white from underneath. The forest convulses as something rises from the soil, throwing trees and boulders asunder. Dio cover's his face as the debris bounces against him. But upon uncovering them, his eyes go wide form shock. Before him and the alien cat stands the dog again, but this time as large as a castle.

The black, oil like drool from its mouth splashes into the ground in globs. It looks down at Dio and the alien cat, the now large light in its eye cavities piercing their very souls. An earthshaking growl rolls out of its throat. It raises its gargantuan paw and swipes at the two. Its speed leaves no time to react, the impact as they are launching both deeper into the forest before they skid to a stop in the dirt.

"Uuuuuurrrrrryyyyyyy…" Dio moans.

"Mrrrrrrrooooowwww…" The cat likewise moans. The two hear the thunder of the large dog's footsteps getting closer and closer. Dio barely climbs to his feet, spitting out some blood. His body is in shambles, his sped up healing unable to keep up. He's in no shape to take on this beast. If only he could feed, he thinks to himself.

Dio's vision falls on to the cat, who is on it's feet, shacking the dirt off itself. More specifically, it focuses in on the seemingly never-ending torrent of blood pouring out of its mouth. He grabs the cat and holds it in front of him.

"Mrow?" The cat queries.

"Do as Dio says! Vomit in Dio's mouth!" Dio shouts. The cat looks at him puzzled.

"Don't think! DO IT!"

Dio holds the cat over his head, his mouth open wide. The cat begins hacking, and then lets a geyser of napalm blood erupt from its mouth. Dio drinks it up, feeling it burn his face and his mouth as he gulps it down. He throws the cat aside as he collapses. The pain is immense, as if fire was coursing through his veins and organs. But the pain subsides as a power arises in him.

"Yes…. YES… YYYYYYYEEEEEEESSSSSSSSS!" Dio shouts, striking a pose. He feels himself return to full strength. No, he feels himself go beyond full strength, his former limits shattered. He watches as the large dog lumbers closer and closer, and smiles.

"USELESS!" Dio shouts, as he rockets himself forward and punches the dog in the forehead. The large undead beast flies back, rolling and tumbling, sending debris into the air.

"UUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYYY YY!" Dio screams. He runs forward towards the felled beast, faster than any creature on Earth could ever move. The dog slowly stumbles to its feet but falls again as Dio tears off one of its legs, throwing it aside. The dog's large wide jaws open and clamp down on Dio.

"USELESS"! Dio shouts, punching the dog's top jaw off, sending it sailing into the horizon. Dio boosts to the dog's neck, where the large collar dangles. As strong and powerful as Dio's body has become, it is no match for his mind. Battling the dog and watching the alien cat, he has seen where these creatures derive their powers: the colored rings they both possess.

Dio tear's what's left of the large dog's head from its body, throwing it aside as if it were paper. The black tentacles erupt from the dog's exposed throat, entangling Dio.

"DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH, MUTT!" Dio shouts, as he freezes the tentacles around him and shatters them, a power in his vampire arsenal he has only just realized he has. Dio reaches for the collar and tag, which has grown to a proportionate size, as has the ring. He grabs it, holding it in his hands.

"WEAKWEAKWEAKWEAKWEAKWEAKWEAK WEAKWEAKWEAKWEAKWEAKWEAKWEAK WEAKWEAKWEAK!" He shouts as he rains punch after punch down on it. It crumbles rapidly, until all that floats in front of him is the small, original sized ring. He grabs it and holds it in his hand, as the large undead dog begins to dissipate.

"Weak," Dio says, as he crushes the ring in his powerful grip and strikes a pose. The rest of the large dog turns to dust, blowing away in the wind.

"Meow," the alien cat says, striking a pose of its own. From the ring on its tail, a small beam emits, engulfing Dio's hand. It pulls the black ring from it, placing it in a small pouch on its belly.

"Meow!"

"Hmph. Do what you want, runt," Dio says. "For helping Dio, you can leave freely, but do not count Dio as your friend. Dio is number one."

"One…" Says an unfamiliar voice behind the two. They both turn to see a small, green frog like creature sitting upon a horse. It has two pistols in its hands, with what looks like a pig woman of some sort drawn on the handles. It tilts its Stetson hat up with one of the guns in its hands, revealing its large, bubbly eyes.

"One. The number one. One comes before two. One is the first number. And one bullet is all I'll need to kill you," it says, as it pulls the hammer back on its pistols.

-TO BE CONTINUED


End file.
